How Do I Score 2011?

New Year is coming upon us. This is an entry I've been working on in my head for a long time. Ever since 2007, it's been pretty easy to "score" what the past year has been...



2007 - Bought our house in Westminster, found out we were having 1st child, I got promoted that year - GREAT

2008 - Noah - GREAT!!!!

2009 - Layoffs at work, our refi deal fell apart between Christmas and New Year's, and Shannon's ectopic - HORRIBLE YEAR

2010 - Pregnant with 2nd child, Work doing better - GOOD



This year...I have no idea how to do this. Darcy was born, so I can't call this a terrible year. She is a wonderful child and a blessing to have every day. But, this can't be a wonderful year. It can't be a great or good year. Because while we have Darcy, we also added this shitty member of our household too. Cancer.



I didn't post this before, because I just didn't want to talk about it or confront the situation head on...Shannon had a CT scan for post-op done on December 7th...Pearl Harbor Day, should've seen that coming. The spots in her lungs grew. In the abscence of any signs of infection, that basically confirms that it is Stage 4 cancer. Despite the successful surgery, the cancer has already spread to her lungs. This is not what we wanted, obviously. This is not what should be happening.

What happens now? Shannon is back on chemo, as we figured she would be post-surgery. But now, I think she has to be on chemo until the spots can dissapear. And that's not even a given, since her chemo treatment pre-surgery never fully removed any spots, only shrunk some. And since it's showing signs of spread, that changes the prognosis. In a direction that we didn't want to think about. Basically, they aren't considering this curable anymore.

Nobody is giving up. She has a lot of fight left, but this development just cuts us down at the knees. The thing I keep coming back to, from a perspective of how this year is...this isn't right. Shannon shouldn't have to be focusing on pills, scans, incisions, colostomies. She should be worrying about Darcy cutting teeth, saying first words, what crap she's getting into now that she can crawl like beast mode. Cancer is a thief, that much is certain. And it's already stolen a laundry list of things from our family. And unfortunately, it seems like that list might keep growing for awhile.

So tell me, how should I score this year? It's horrible to think of this year as a shit year, because Darcy's birth was something great. That's not fair to Darcy. But it's not fair that I be forced to score this year as good when we have this kind've shit from cancer. This year has brought so much loss upcoming to our family, how can you celebrate it? Shannon said she'll still toast the new year because, to be honest, next year CAN'T be worse, right? Right? Maybe right? Hopefully right!?

I think all that can be said...F*@# Cancer! You dirty rat, you can't win this war, we can't let you. Also, I'm going to cut your balls off. Maybe not today, maybe not next year, but someday, I will find a way to spit on your figurative grave, you POS disease.

Twelve Years of Rust: 1st 5K

Quite late in posting about this, but it's been a busy month, so sue me. Or don't, I don't have the money to deal with that.

So, 11/5/11. My 1st 5K. First, I want to state again how humbled and gracious I am for the outpouring of donations we got for the race. My original team goal was to raise $1000. We finished at a bit over $3000! We were officially the 2nd place team for fundraising at the time of the race, but another team got some post-race donations, putting them in 2nd place. Whatever, I'm just glad we were able to smash through my original goal. And the donations came from all corners...Coworkers, FB friends, Shannon's friends, family, family, family, people from my Ravens board. There were quite a few people who donated who have never seen either one of us in person. That is touching.

I saw a text before the race from Shannon which indicated there was a chance she would get released from the hospital that day, and that definitley helped give me some extra strength for this. It was FRIGID. No other way to describe it, it was just absolutely freezing when we got there at 7am. It warmed up a little bit after the race started, but by then, I had already clipped my race bib onto my jacket, so I ran the race in the following gear:

Winter hat (Plain, removed about halfway through the race)

Gloves (Water wicking, removed about halfway through the race)

Track Jacket (Unzipped 1/3 of the way through the race)

White Undershirt (Worn on top of long sleeve shirt and water wicking shirt)

Longsleeve T-Shirt (Plain)

Running Shirt

Track Pants

Underwear worn under pants

Undy Boxers worn over pants

Batman underwear worn over Undy boxers

Socks and shoes

Within the first mile, we'd seperated into a few packs. Bill and two of my co-workers ran with me, letting me set the pace. A few minutes behind us were two of my other co-workers who have had knee injuries (In his defense, Chuck was coming off a knee injury in the last month and ran in the 1st group), and then Andy was a few minutes behind them. About halfway into the race, I made up my mind that I was going to run the whole thing. I had only run for 20 minutes one time before, but I felt like I was doing good enough halfway through, it'd just be the right thing to do, running the whole thing. It wasn't really a problem until I decided I wanted to sprint at the end. I first caught sight of the finish line at roughly 1/4 mile to go. I started to sprint, then realized I'd never make it before I'd have to walk it. So I waited until I was literally within throwing distance of the finish line. And then I just went all out. The picture that was taken of me finishing looks quite ridiculous, as my coat is flailing around me and my face looks just...weird.

My finish time was 32:30, from start line to finish line. Not a great time for my age group, but I wasn't dead last or even close to it. I finished just behind the "middle of the pack", roughly top 60%. My pace was better than all my previous runs too. So, I'll take those results, just need to keep improving. And I'm proud/thankful to my fellow runners. Bill, Chuck, and Jay finished just after me, Dan and Slava finished a few minutes later, and Andy powered through about 8 minutes after I had, give or take a bit. We all finished in sub-42 minute time, so I feel very proud of our group.

And bonus, Shannon did come home that day. This should be just the first of many goals I'm going to set for myself, fitness wise. Already tenatively doing the Tough Mudder DC in May. I keep flip flopping on that though. Just seems like such a huge leap to go from a 5K race to a 10-13 mile endurance challenge, involving feats of strength. I just worry that Warrior Dash will be a bit of a letdown in terms of pushing my limits.

I'm Not a Gourmet Cook, But I Try...: Pork Stew

Have I mentioned how much I love crock pot meals? Granted, about half the ones I've tried have kind've come out flat, but the ones that taste good, I love making again and again. The only problem is that you have to remember to prepare the night before. Pork stew is probably the most complicated crockpot meal I make. Beef Stew, Pot Roast...just dump a bunch of veggies in, put your meat on top, add seasoning, go. Chili....ok, chili is probably the most complicated to PREPARE. But chili is an experience with me. Pork Stew is probably easy enough to prepare, but there's noodles that have to be cooked seperate, gravy that has to be thickened. But it does taste real yummy. And I was suprised to see it wasn't all that bad in terms of calories and fat.

Pork Stew with Egg Noodles

1.5 pounds Boneless Center Cut Pork Chops
3 cans pork gravy
12 oz baby carrots
1 large white onion
8 oz mushrooms
3 tbsp corn starch
1/3 cup water
1 bag egg noodles

1. Trim any fat from the pork chops and then chop into bite size cubes
2. Add pork, baby carrots, and mushrooms to crock pot
3. Chop onion into small wedges and add to crock pot
4. Pour all 3 cans of pork gravy into the crock pot
5. Cook on high for 4 hours or low for 8 hours
6. Boil a large pot of water (Dutch Oven size), then add egg noodles and cook until they are nice and soft
7. Once the crock pot is done, use a collander in a large bowl to separate the gravy from the pork and vegetables
8. In a separate bowl, stir the corn starch and water until they are a smooth mixture
9. Pour the gravy into a saucepan and bring to a boil
10. Add the starch mixture in slowly, stirring as it's added. You are finished when the sauce is thickened throughout
11. Pour the thickened gravy back into the crock pot

Per 2 ladles of stew and 1 cup egg noodles

430 calories
10 grams fat
48 carbs
36 grams protein

Notes:

• Hard to gauge the serving size on this. Originally thought it made 8 servings, but 2.5 of us ran through that stew pretty well in one sitting with no seconds
  


• I'm sure you could reduce the numbers with a different pasta
  

Twelve Years of Rust: How Far I've Come...

Been awhile since I've posted about my fitness/health. I'm still doing the diet and I'm still working towards my goal, but sometimes the progress is a bit slowgoing, and I only want to post when I hit a big milestone or have something big to say.

So weight wise, I've hit the halfway mark. I'm getting real close to leaving the 200 level behind, but whenever I want to hit a mark, it always seems to take some roller coaster hills to get through it. So I've dipped to as low as 203, went back up a few pounds, am now hovering around 204. I'd like to still go for 160 by April 2012, but that goal might fall a bit short. No matter, if I'm 170-180 in April, that's still a HUGE leap forward. And then I can just stick with the diet a few extra months, hit my goal, and transition to the maintain diet.

Now, running. I took a running/jogging class in college, but I can't remember my mile time, or whether I could actually sustain a run for a full mile. I do remember gym class in high school. I remember running with Andy Bruchey, both of us pondering if we'd need crash carts at the end of running a mile. I remember falling to the ground after the mile was up. It felt like such a labor to get through a single mile. With Shannon's surgery being a few days before the 5k, and her not likely to be released from the hospital before the 5k, my last chances to run would've been Thursday (I had a minor surgical procedure on 10/21 and was limited from running until then). So on Thursday, I broke out the cold weather gear (performance tee, long sleeve white tee, track pants, gloves, thermal hat) and decided to do a practice 5k. I did it in 34 minutes and felt pretty decent. I planned to do one more practice/tune-up run this weekend. Was originally going to try it yesterday during the snow, but I was too tired and ended up going to sleep early. So tonight, I said I need to do this. Originally planned to just do 20 mins of running...

I did a 2nd 5K. I did 10K in 4 days.

And you know what? I did not need a crash cart. I did not fall down at the end. I felt good.

I think I see the corner and I've rounded it. In just 5 months since I started tracking my runs, I've:

Run 90+ miles

Run 18+ hours

Burned 74+ donuts off

Powered nearly 15 TVs

Shaved about 2:30 off my mile pace

Just a note to my friends out there who say they need to start exercising but put it off, or think they can't do it...I did it. I went from 260 pounds to almost 200, and from struggling to run 1.5 miles to pulling off 5K in almost no sweat.

I'm Not a Gourmet Cook, But I Try...: The Chili Recipe

I need to take a minute to describe how epic this post/recipe is. Chili is, by far, my favorite thing to cook. #1, there’s a lot of mixing involved, so it’s a big undertaking. #2, it’s less the “cut, dry, color, repeat” type recipe that I usually make, because you have to taste it as it cooks, adjust the seasonings here and there, etc. And #3, chilis is just awesome. Shannon doesn’t like it, and Noah won’t eat anything spicy like that, so I’m relegated to making it for my co-workers a couple times a year. Over the years, I’ve gotten compliments from them, and I don’t think it’s just patronizing, because there’s usually not much left at the end of the day. I’m not going to go out and say this is the best chili recipe, but I think it works well. Not too crazy spicy, but has a kick to it.

Now that I’m counting calories, it was good to add everything up and see that this doesn’t break your back on a diet. I used to make it with 2 pounds ground beef (Usually 80/20) and 1 lb pork sausage. Instead, I went with turkey sausage, 1 lb 96% lean ground beef, and 1 lb 93% lean ground turkey. If you modify the recipe to throw those in instead, each bowl serving is 24 grams of fat. And keep in mind, I usually had two bowls on the days I made it. 48 grams of fat, in one meal, and that’s not counting in cheese to top it, or chips on the side. Wow.

So, without any more ado…here is my chili recipe.

Lean Hearty Chili with Beef and Turkey

1.25 pounds 93/7 ground turkey
1 pound 96/4 ground beef
1 bag Jimmy Dean’s Fully Cooked Turkey Sausage Crumbles
1 28oz can diced tomatoes, drained
1 29oz can tomato sauce
1 14.5oz can diced tomatoes with green chiles, drained
1 15oz can kidney beans
1 cup chopped green peppers
1 cup chopped onion
8 oz beer
4 tbsp chili powder
4 tsp ground cumin
2 tsp garlic powder
2 tsp salt
2 tsp cinnamon

1. Peel and dice onion and green pepper.
2. Open and drain both cans of diced tomatoes
3. Open, rinse, and drain kidney beans
4. Pour tomato sauce, both cans diced tomatoes, kidney beans, green peppers, and onion into 5 quart crockpot
5. Brown all the meat together, drain, then simmer in beer for 5-10 minutes.
6. Add ground beef and beer to crock pot. Stir well
7. Sprinkle about 2 tbsp chili powder, 2 tsp ground cumin, 2 tsp cinnamon, 1 tsp garlic powder, and 1 tsp salt into crockpot, stir
8. Cook for 8 hours on low or 4 hours on high. If cooking unattended, repeat step 7 before turning on crockpot. If cooking attended, add seasonings in to taste.

Per 12 oz of chili:

248 calories
7.5 grams fat
20 carbs
26 grams protein

Notes:

• Remember, I said the old recipe was 24 g fat per bowl. From 24 to 7.5, just by switching up the meat a little…
  


• I’ve cheated a bit before and used a chili seasoning mix packet to add some more flavor to it. Didn’t have one this time, and I’m still pleased with the result
  


• If you want to go spicier, I would add in some chopped jalapeno peppers.
  


• I tried this before with light beer instead of my go to beer, Yuengling. Do yourself a favor, don’t do it. I would say the same for non-alcoholic beer.

The One Where I Just Go Off In A Million Directions

Been awhile since I blogged for blogging sake, without a specific motif in mind. I have a couple things to post about, none of which constitute a standalone post, so I'm just going to update lots of things in general

Shannon is setup for surgery on November 1st. We were hoping for a sooner surgery date, but they need to schedule two different surgeons for a whole day, so it had to be a bit longer. It works fine, just a long time to wait around. Still some uncertainty about how the cancer fight is doing, but she's fighting it hard, and there's still things to hope for, so we're continuing to hope, pray and fight. Some days, I'm downtrodden and get caught up in worries. But lately...something just feels better. Like something is reassuring me that we don't need to worry so much. I can't explain it, just lots of days where it almost feels this whole thing is starting to get behind us.

Noah is....every bit of a 3 year old. I love him, but he can really be a butt somedays. He routinely tells me he doesn't like me and wants me to go away. It hurts even though I know he doesn't really mean it. I know it's just him being three, but it gets tough to handle some most of the time. He doesn't act up at school, from what we can tell, so I won't complain much. He's a good kid. He went to a wedding on Saturday (Very proud that my kid experienced a same sex wedding at an early age), and that kid is a RIOT when he dances (See here). He's finally started on swim lessons. VERY cautious in the water, but he listens well.

Darcy is a major cutie. She smiles at EVERYONE. I am going to need a big ass shotgun....probably sooner rather than later. She can't sit up quite yet, but soon I can tell. Her weight and head have joined the "normal" world and are up to 25th percentile. Meanwhile, like Noah, her height is nearly off the charts.

Only two more pounds to lose to hit 50. I want that set of steak knives! I'm feeling thinner and though I don't notice any change when checking a mirror shirtless, I look thinner when dressed in clothes I think. I'm loving the progress I've made, because this is seriously so much more than I've ever done before. And it's such a big thing to hang my hat on. 210 isn't a good weight to be either, but 50 pounds off me probably added a year or two to my life, at least.

Remember my last post about Red Cross? So, I'm donating platelets. Friday. Super psyched to know I'm helping to save someone's life.

I'm getting back to my running strength, pre-blood donation. Shaved my time down to 10:30 per mile. I'm still running the Undy 5k, even though it's just 4 days after Shannon's surgery. Shannon told me I still had to run it. So you should either run it with me or donate or send it around. I bumped the team goal up to 1,000 after we smashed our last goal of 800. Friends of Shannon Hamilton Team Page

Apparently, I'm an Untapped Oil Well

So remember how in my last post, I mentioned that I was interested in donating platelets?

Got a call from the Red Cross today. Apparently when my blood work came back from my donation, they noted that I was:
1. Male
2. Blood type A+
3. High Platelet Count

Those three things means they marked my report with a smiley face and handed it off to the lady who called me. Because according to her, I am "a universal donor for platelets". You don't know how much that pumps me up. As soon as I can figure out the best logistics, I'm so donating platelets now. Especially when I see that platelets are only useable for 5 days. So any donations that come in now, HAVE to be used right away, otherwise they are unusable. So right away, I'll be helping 1-3 people per donation. AND platelet donations don't weaken your running like donating blood does. That's why my runs have been harder to finish.

So that just ends up being a happy irony. I was already thinking about doing it, then I find out I'm "in demand" to do it. Sweet!